ITT OBSCURE POSSIBLY UNACCEPTABLE FETISHES.

So I have this fetish that I've never heard anyone else talk about for obvious reason, and I think there may be something wrong with me. So here goes.

>be at party with gf at the time
>drinking beers/having good time
>gf begins to get noticeably drunk and she's not pacing herself.
>smirk.png
>stoprdrinking.gif
>gf is now close to wasted, and horny.
>find secluded bedroom
>start fooling around
>gf too drunk to continue, passes out
>sweat collects around brow
>hear rate increases
>euphoria increases
>dick size increases
>get up and search room/house for small items or bits of food.
>get back into bed with passed out gf
>test waters poke/call name/shake
>no response
>ohfuckingchrist.png
>euphoria is now unimaginable
>lift gfs ass cheeks
>lick/wet item
>wet gfs asshole with saliva
>take item and press into gfs tight butthole
>thrill increases
>push item as deep into ass as possible
>continue till all items are in anal cavity
>jack off then fall asleep

/b/ what is wrong with me. Does anyone else have this fetish. Can anyone relate?

Pic related: when the m&m gets past the sphincter..